Celebrating my Christmas miracle :)

We had a wonderful Christmas!! We didn't really do gifts this year, although my hubby DID suprise me with a beautiful locket from "Ronan" ;) inside were pictures of the two guys that mean the most to me :)
Brian and I must think alike because I also suprised him with a new wallet with picture of Ronan and him and I.
It was a pretty low key Christmas, we went for a walk outside with our dog and Ronan. He does really well in the car seat and his stroller. and ofcourse Hazel enjoyed getting out of the house and romping around in the great outdoors. She really is doing awesome with the baby :)

We are starting to get into a routine, I mean... as much of a routine as you CAN with a newborn... it seems at this stage they make their OWN routine hehe.
I'm a little nervous about Brian going back to work next week :( He has been SOOOO helpful and I am scared that when he leaves it will all fall apart, or atleast I will. I am feeling like I am adapting to the Mother role very well, and am even fairly confident in my abilities... the hardest part for me right now is the SLEEEEPING!!! It's very difficult for me to nap when he does during the day. I get so fixated on cleaning and organizing while he sleeps. Then when he decides to stay up all night, I am a complete wreck.
I'm just praying that this part won't last too long, and before we know it we will be establishing SOME sort of routine that will provide us both enough sleep :)

Besides all that, i couldn't be any happier. My son is so stinking beautiful!!! Praise the Lord for my long awaited miracle... sometimes I still taken aback when I look at him. When i realize he is really mine! And this trial that I have been struggling with for SO long is finally over!!!

I hope all of you enjoyed your Christmas as well :)

Busy Busy Busy!!!!

Here are the picures that are going out on our Christmas card

WOW, life with a newborn is insanely busy!!!! I don't even know where to begin! I cannot remember the last time I slept more than 3 hours in a row, yet somehow I have plenty of energy through out the day!!! Thanks God! Ronan pees on himself all the time? how does this happen? Partly because Brian puts his diapers on funny :) (hey, atleast he is changing him!) He poops all the time, and caring for his little circumsized penis can be challenging. Vaseline is not as easy to apply as one might think.
He has put himself on a feeding schedule of every four hours, which is fine by me. And is the absoloute cutest most handsome baby I have ever seen in my life!!!! His expressions are priceless, and his sleeping face is so precious. The smell of his breath and skin. Everything about him, I love. I have a hard time ever setting him down. I think the only times he isnt in my arms is when he gets daddy time, I am eat, sleeping or going to the bathroom. Other than that, this little man is always with me :) What can I say, i just love him SOOOO MUCH!!!!
He has had a lot of visitors and has mets lots of his family, but he will meet even MORE on Christmas eve :) How special is that?
Anyway, I only have about 10 minutes before he wakes up and wants to nurse. The healing process is still a process, I am still very very sore, but it's getting better.
I am just insanely thankful and greatful to our wonderful Lord and Savior who allowed us this special blessing!!! Praise you God!!

He is HOME!!!!

Praise the Lord, my miracle has come home with me!!! Ronan Edward Holman was born December 10th at 8:37 pm after about 20 hours of painful contractions. It started around midnight, Wednesday night... the night before my induction! I had a strange feeling about it, so I took a nice long shower and hoped to get some sleep before the inevitable happened. No such luck. The contractions were too painful and about 8 minutes apart. There wasn't enough time to fall asleep inbetween! We decided to go in and get checked out.
We were like the 10th pregnant couple to arrive, apparently it was a busy day at the labor and delivery! They assesed me, and I was only 1 1/2 cm dilated and 75% effaced. Normally they probably would have sent me home, but thankfully my wonderful DR was on call and since I was scheduled for an induction 24 hours from then, he figured they would work along side my contractions with the pitocin if things didn't progress on their own. I was SO thankful because it was NOT very comfortable haha. I got my own room eventually and the most WONDERFUL nurse! Everything was just perfect, even the pain. I knew my sweet heart would be coming soon! Unfortunatly my contractions began to get further and further apart and I wasn't making any cervical progression, so they added the pitocin. oh BOY! it wasn't bad at first. Just slightly more regular. They eventually got some strong and were somewhat irregular I was having a really hard time dealing with it. They gave me a narcotic, which was nice at first, but really only made me sleepy and loopy and did NOT help with the pain. After a few more hours my epidural came, THANK GOODNESS!!!! I think I got my epidural around 4:30pm. They then upped my pitocin, hoping to get some regular contractions to change my cervix... two hours later, around 6:00 pm my dr comes in to check on me... "you are probably in for a loooong night he said, probably a midnight delivery, but let's check you first" so he checks me... and YAY some progress! I was now 3 cm dilated and 100% effaced, "WOW" he said, "let's break your water" I was SO happy at that point! I felt nothing when he apparently broke my water, and then it was back to waiting... I was getting excited because if nothing else, Survivor was about to come one, and then a new episode of the Office lol... So it's about 10 minutes to Survivor 7:50 pm and I am starting to feel a lot of pressure in my cathedar. I tell the nurse and she says she will check me in about 10 minutes... 15 minutes later I am getting antsy. Brian is asleep on the couch and I am having my mom take peaks because it feel weird hahah. The nurse finally comes in, checks me and much to our suprise I was COMPLETE! "you can start pushing any time now"...... wait... WHAT??? I woke up Brian and the Dr. came in... Survivor started and I pushed on the commercial breaks.. No i am kidding ofcourse haha. But it was the strangest thing! It wasn't painful at ALL because of the epidural, but I could feel when I was supposed to push. They had a mirror up for me which was AWESOME. I could see his head starting to emerge. LOTS of dark hair!!!
After a little under 30 minutes of pushing Ronan was out! They handed him directly to me, and after that everything became a blur. Everything was about Ronan now, I didn't care that I was being stitched from vagina to rectum due to a 3rd degree tear. My eyes couldn't leave my son... He was so beautiful. I held him for a good 30 minutes while they stitched me. I cannot explain the feeling. It was just so right, and calm and wonderful. It all happened so fast i just couldn't believe he was finally in my arms... safe.

We were discharged around 11:00 AM saturday and have been enjoying some peace and quiet around the house.
tomorrow is his first appt with the pediatrition, and I have a post pardum check up. We will also attempt to get our first family pic soon by the Christmas tree so that we can send them out as Christmas cards/ announcements.

ALSO I think my milk is coming in already! My boobs are AMAZING!!!!!! hahah it is deffinatly taking some adjusting around the house, but things are slowly falling into place. Praise the Lord!!!!

2 days to go!

Oh my goodness... I cannot believe there are only 2 days until I head into the hospital!!! I mean... seriously, i cannot believe it!!!
I got my schedule yesterday, EVERYTHING IS OFFICIALLY SET!!!! here is my plan of action for thursday...

Clean house, so it's all perfect when I come home :)
Take a nap
Take a bath so I am descent looking (and smelling) for doctors and pictures ;)
Finish packing my hospital bag
Eat a BIG MEAL
Drive to the hospital, check in around 11:50 pm

THEN when I get there they will check me in and start the cream stuff (whatever it is called) to soften the cervix more, and I get my own room!!! AHHHHHH and THEN my RONAN WILL COME (after some laboring ofcourse)

Thank you LORD!!! Thank you so much for this blessing! Praise you God for hearing my heart's cries, and answering my prayers. Thank you God for filling this ache in our lives. We will remember you and remember your goodness every time we look into our son's eyes. You have given us a gift we could never repay you for.
Thank you... Praise your name!!!!!!!!!!!!!

40 weeks!!!!

TODAY IS MY DUE DATE!!!!!! ..... so..... why is he still in there? Can someone remind me?? hehe. I had my appt today, it was slightly rushed because one of my dr's patients needed an emergency c-section. There was good news and bad news. Hardly any change with my cervix... that is the bad news. The good news is that we have an induction lined up!!! Brian and I decided that we do not want to go over 41 weeks, for many different reasons. Partly inpatience, but mostly for safety. We are still hoping that I go into labor before the induction, which is scheduled for thursday evening/friday morning, but if labor doesn't happen on it's own, THERE IS AN END IN SIGHT and i will be holding my baby in 7 days!!

HOW AM I GOING TO SURVIVE THESE 7 DAYS????? uuuugggghhhh I just want him to be here now. I cannot wait!!!!

So until then, I will pray for patience, and strength. I will also be praying for my son's health!! There is nothing more important to me right now, than seeing to it that my boy makes it here healthy and safe!!! If you feel led to pray for his safety as well, it would be MUCH appriciated :)

I CAN'T WAIT FOR NEXT WEEK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Praise the LORD!! My gracious God is going to bless my heart's desire!!!!

Can I be done now?

The waiting is killing me!!!!!!!!!! I am so scared I am going to have to wait another 2 weeks... I won't even allow the thought that I may have to wait 3 weeks, NO! I will be begging for an induction if he hasn't come by 41 weeks.

Please Lord, let me hold Ronan soon!!! Please prepare my body for labor, and allow Ronan a safe delivery into this world!

This wednesday is the next full moon, apparently a lot of women who are full term go into labor on full moons. I am getting desperate! Wednesday evening I will be standing outside staring at the full moon doing a labor dance ;)

To make matters worst, I am completley bored over here. Hubby is gone working, and I am stuck at home doing nothing but waiting. The highlight of my day today was walking my dog, then baking banana bread... I'm such a loser haha. Atleast I have wednesday to look forward too, no not the full moon (although I am excited for that too) but my mother in law will be flying in. We are going to shop, and cook meals to put in the freazer for after Ronan comes. We will also watch plenty on movies i'm sure. She will be staying in our guest room for awhile because she is also going to help take care of the house and our puppy after Ronan is born so that Brian and I can enjoy our time together as new parents without having to cook and clean :)

But until then, I am left to fight the loneliness and bordem by myself.... Okay, I'm going to go beg the Lord to start my labor again, and officially serve Ronan his eviction notice... ha. ha. ha. kidding ofcourse.
Hope everyone has a wonderful week!!

39 weeks!!!!!

Thanksgiving was a lot of fun! My mom, dad, brother and his wife came to visit us!! Today I had my 39 weeks appt, and apparently gained over 2 lbs this weeks :( I am blaming it on all the food yesterday ;) It will be nice to be able to work out again and have my body back (or get as close to it as I can!)
Speaking of my body... my stretch marks finally started making an appearance. Who did I think I was to escape this ever so distict "mom" trait. OFCOURSE they decided to show up the last week of pregnancy! They aren't bad... yet, but if you look closely in my belly pic, you can see them. They are very low, under my belly. The scratch on my tummy is NOT a stretch mark haha, that was me. I accidently scratched myself while putting on my shirt haha.
The appointment today was pretty much same old same old. He checked my cervix and said that I am atleast making good progress. Ronan is still in a -2 station (head is low) He could fit his finger tip into my cervix, and I am about 50% effaced. He said he would be suprised if I went too far past my due date. I REALLLLY hope he is right. I was REALLY hoping he would be a little EARLY, especially because I know he is not so little anymore. Now I am just hoping and praying he will be on time :)
How is it that I am SO excited to meet him!!! Just the thought that he COULD come any time makes me SO excited and anxious I get all teary! I want him NOW!!! I want to hold him NOW and feed him NOW. This is seriously going to be the longest week ever.

PLEASE little boy, come out! Your mama cannot wait to hold you!!!

Ronan's growth u/s follow up & i added some POLLS!

Well, I'm almost 38 weeks, and as you can remember, at my last appt (5 days ago) my fundal height was still only 33 cm...

Last time (3 weeks ago) he was measuring in the 28th % at about 4lbs 15oz.

Today he was measuring in the 52nd % at about 7lbs 2oz!

I guess he had a growth spurt!!! My ultrasound technician was very sweet and let us watch him do his "practice breathing" for awhile, she also tried to get shots of his face (he has cute chubby cheeks) and feet. So, all is well with little Ronan i cannot wait to have him out! He looks SO CUTE!!!!

I am getting a lot of random pressure in my cervix, accompanied by sharp shooting pains, OUCH!! I hope it's his head pushing into my cervix, causing it to dialate!! I also continue to have a lot of Braxton hicks, which vary in intensity... I cannot wait for them to become regular and painful :) that's weird isn't it? Oh well, I don't care.

Tomorrow is the midnight showing of New Moon, yes I know I am crazy for going to a midnight showing at 9 months pregnant. Even crazier because I have a dr's appointment the next morning!! I THEN will have family coming to visit over the weekend, so it's going to be busy!!! I'm not sure I will be able to come on and update for my 38 week post!

**** OH, and I added a couple Polls on the right side -----> *******
Just for fun, you can make guesses about when he will come, and how much he might weigh at birth. Remember, the u/s can be off by as much as 10% either way... It's not 100% accurate!

Reflecting...

As I was sitting at my computer, I was just remembering how 9 short months ago I was feeling completely defeated. I remember wondering if it would EVER happen again, if I would EVER be a mommy. I wondered if I would ever have the chance to feel a life moving inside of me. I wondered if I would ever get to complain about swollen feet, and feeling like a beached whale. I wondered if I would ever get to experience childbirth, and the moment the doctor would hand over to me my long awaited child...

Then I remember the day when it finally DID happen. I still don't know why I took an at home test. It must have been God nudging my heart. Usually I was terrified of tests. I hated seeing that lonely pink line. It seemed to define me in a way... all alone, and no shadow of a line next to it...
But on March 23rd a shadow of a line DID join my solid pink line. I remember calling my mom, telling her what I thought I might have seen. Then, on the 24th, 11 days past ovulation, I took another test, one that was a little more expensive, but much more reliable. In my heart I was terrified of seeing that stupid pink lonely line, but I somehow knew the second line would be there again, but darker... I waited and waited, and BOOM it showed up.
I remember thinking... "no... no way" All my brain kept saying to myself was, "did it really happen?" The logistics of it all came pouring in, "did a sperm REALLY make it's way to my follicle and fertilize it? Did it really make it's way down my fallopian tube and implant itself in my uterus?? Is there REALLY A BABY GROWING IN MY WOMB???" HOW DID THIS HAPPEN??? FINALLY??"

I remember in that moment, being so unsure, but so sure at the same time. I remember the tears that came rushing to my eyes. My heart pounding so fast, and my legs wanting to give out on me. I remember falling to the floor and praising God... Praising him for the miracle he allowed to happen.
I took so many tests that day, and the next day was my blood draw at the clinic to see if I was pregnant. I was so excited I brought my positive tests IN THE OFFICE to show the Nurses haha, they all laughed at me and said congratulations... I must have seemed so silly, but I was so proud of those positive tests.

I will never forget it... Just as I will never forget the very first time I became pregnant with my Adriel. Both such amazing special memories. I'm so thankful that this pregnancy will have a happier ending though. I still miss my Adriel, and I think I always will. I cannot wait to meet him in heaven someday and find out what was so important that God needed to call him home so early. He must be very important up there :)

This blog really has no point but to serve as a reflection I suppose. Remembering the saddness of loosing my Adriel, but also the joy that he brought me when I first found out, and the joy of a second new life, my Ronan. The joys I have felt my entire pregnancy as I have felt him grow. How blessed I have been!!! Thank you Lord for this gift, for the opportunity. I am so thankful that you allowed me the pleasure. This has trully been everything I had hoped for. God, you are TOO good. I am forever thankful for Ronan. I cannot wait to meet him Lord!!! Please keep both of us safe through delivery!
I'm going to meet my son soon!!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!

37 weeks!!!

I AM FULL TERM!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOOOOORRAYYY!!!!!!!

I had my dr's appt. today, and am officially considered "FULL TERM" what a WONDERFUL FEELING!!!! Doctor felt around my tummy today, and said that he would put him at about 6 lbs, and that he has descended pretty deep into my pelvis. He thinks we will be a Thanksgiving baby :)
I am still measuring small with my uterus, at only 33 cm, as opposed to 37 cm. He said it is likely because I am taller and thinner, and that I am hiding him well. I guess I can live with that, as long as i know he is healthy. So just to be on the safe side we are going to have another ultrasound to make sure everything looks good. We have it scheduled for wednesday, so it will have been 3 weeks from the last ultrasound, exactly.

Other than that, not much else to report! I am starting to feel a little better sickness wise. I'm still congested, and have successfully passed it on to my dear hubby :) poor guy. Don't feel too bad for him though, he has basically had a full week off haha.

Well, that is all for now!! I just prayt that these last few weeks go by quickley and that Ronan stay healthy and safe, growing stronger and stronger for D-DAY!!!

I am SOOOO SICK!

Oh man, the last 2 days have been close to miserable for me. I know it could be worst so I'm trying to count my blessings. However, I think I have the worst head cold that I have had in a loooong time. I am so incredibly plugged up and congested! Nothing seems to help either, I left my humidifier on all night, even sat next to it with a sheet draped over me for a while to breathe in the vapors... my mucas didn't budge. Sleep was pretty hopeless last night. My throat hurt so bad, breathing was uncomfortable!
I am thankful Ronan is still tucked away safely in my womb, because it would be hard to care for a newborn right now, and i would HATE for him to get sick too :(
I keep wondering if me being ill is effecting him at all in anyway. I really hope not. I hope he is blissfully unaware.
Only 3 days until I am considered FULL TERM! I never thought I would make it this far. God is trully gracious. I hope I can repay him by being the best mama I can be. I know that this is who God created me to be, I know when he formed me, he was forming a mother. It has been my heart's desire since I was a child. I cannot wait for the adventures that lie ahead with little Ronan, and hopefully the children to come after him as well.

On a more upsetting note, this week has also been filled with tradgedies :( My cousin had her house broken into, and had many items stolen, although i'm not even sure any of that can compare to the violation you feel after.
We also found out that a close friend of ours had his wife leave him, with their 2 little ones.
And probably the most upsetting is my friend who recently announced her pregnancy, also announced that her precious child has a very rare disease, in which the kidneys did not form properly. The prognosis is not good, in that it is apparently "incompatible with life". Needless to say, I am still praying for a miracle. I do not want this dear friend of mine to know the ache and pain of a loss. There is nothing more painful. So if you are reading this and you feel led, PLEASE say a prayer for my friend and her precious child...

Well, it's back to the couch for me! Sipping hot tea, filling the room with nasty tissues, and cuddling my dog while watching movies :)

36 weeks, I've entered the 9th MONTH!!!!

It's HERE!!! The NINTH MONTH!!!!! YAY!!!!

Things are going well! Ronan is his active little self, and I am more sluggish and tired, achey and sore, hormonal and grumpier than ever ;) But at the same time, I am also the happiest, most blessed woman alive!!!

I had my 36 week appt yesterday, and got my first cervical check. He normally doesn't even check until 40 weeks, but being curious I asked if he could check! I had NOOOOO idea what that actually entailed... I figured it would be something like an anual, where they use a speculum to "peak" inside... IT'S NOT! The next thing I knew he was in up to his ELBOW!!!... ok not really, but it felt like it! HOLY CRAP! It hurt SOOOOOO bad! Not much to report though, he said i was getting soft though! So i guess that is something... however, i will NOT be asking him to check again anytime soon.

I also had my strep b test done, which also wasn't pleasent hehe. They have to swab your um.... *ahem* OTHER hole... like the butt one. hahaha and OUCH!

After that, he measured my uterus height (fundal height) and I'm STILL measuring behind. About 3 cm. Which i read is really common, especially if you carry low, are taller, or more slender, or have well toned abdominal muscles, which all apply to me. So i guess it's a little reassuring, but I like to worry myself needlessly apparently. The Doctor didn't seem worried one bit. He mentioned that he would keep an eye on it, but by the time he would want to do another u/s to compare his growth development, he will be showing up!

I feel like I am SO close to holding him in my arms, but so far away at the same time... I find myself more worried for him NOW than I ever have before. I don't know if it's because I know I'm so close to actually having him and i don't want anything to go wrong now... I... blech I don't know. I'm hardly even making sense. I guess part of me is still just so scared that it's just too good to be true. It's hard for me to ACTUALLY believe that I'm going to be having a BABY!! I still feel "infertile" in some ways. I feel like I just need to actually see him, hold him in my arms, look into his eyes to know, it's all real. I trully DO have a son and he is HERE!!!!

Lord, you know worries. You know the fear that hides in my heart. I pray that you would take it away Lord. I pray you would replace it with anticipation and excitment. With confidence that you are watching over Ronan, and that in a few short weeks he will be in my arms, safe. Please continue to meet his needs in the womb. Please keep him healthy, strong and growing. I love this little boy with all my heart. I SO look forward to meeting the one you have given to me to raise. To see how you have formed him in your own Amazing way. Give me strength these last few weeks to fully trust YOU!!!
I love you Lord!!

Amen.

A little bit of panic!

After handing out halloween treats to all the cute little kids i began noticing that I hadn't felt my little Ronan move for quite awhile, which is NOT normal for him. He is VERY active. I had felt him shift a bit and press up against me, and dh could still heart his heart so i wasn't completely worried. I tried ALLLL the tricks that normally get him to go crazy, like drinking cold water, or orange juice. Laying on my side. Squishing him... He wasn't budging. We called the Dr. and they said to go ahead and come on in since it wasn't his normal- better safe than sorry.
We got there very quickly and they hooked me up to a monitor right away. They monitored him for about 30 minutes. OFCOURSE the minute that the monitors were placed around me Ronan started going bonkers :) that little stinker! Rolling and pushing all over the place. The nurse came in and said that everything looked very healthy. He had several accelerations. She did say however to watch for too many contractions. I guess while being monitored I had 2 big ones (which i felt, but figured were normal) and 1 small one (probably from all the stress)
Anyways, all turned out ok and I'm praising God for keeping my Ronan safe.

The lady next to us in the triage was hilarious to listen to. She had NO clue about... ANYTHING. She said she was in labor and was going to have her baby any minute, but the nurses kept trying to reassure her that she wasn't even 1 cm dialated and that she wasn't far enough along to deliver him. The lady was crazy and kept talking like he was coming out any minute, saying, "if I have him now will he be born at midnight, or 11:00pm due to day lights savings?
DH and I couldn't help but be slightly amused. those poor nurses.

So it was a bit scary, but all ended well. The nurse reassured us that we made the right choice. It's ALWAYS better safe than sorry. And even if he is still moving, but there is a decrease in his normal activity, it's important to find out WHY. So i didn't feel foolish for coming in. Nothing would've stopped me anyway. I will do everything in my power to keep my little man safe, even if I look foolish doing it.

Thank God he is fine. Just a little pistol ;)

35 weeks!

35 weeks pregnant today! WAHOOOOOO! That means only 2 weeks until I am considered "full term" and 5 weeks away from my actual due date! HOLY COW!!!! Sometimes it still seems too good to be true. I'm so anxious for him to just get here already so I can hold him in my arms and meet his needs directly. I look forward to all the little things. Putting him in his car seat, dressing him, changing him, nursing him, watching him sleep, listening to all his little sounds... *sigh* I just cannot wait!!! Lord, let the time fly by!!! Keep him safe!

So a lot has happened! I had my appt. on monday, his heart beat sounded excellent, but I am measuring a tad small. The top of my uterus is only measuring around 32 cm I believe, when it should have been measuring around 34. It's not an exact science as, it can be appear smaller depending on his position. The Dr. figured it's probably just because he has "dropped" quite a bit. He palpated my stomach and could tell his little head was really far down there :) But just to be safe and not just assume it's his position he sent me for a growth ultrasound.
I was so looking forward to seeing his cute little face again, but on wednesday (my ultrasound) all we could see were body parts :) which are equally as important, just not as *cute* hehe. His head was too far down to see. But his heart looked excellent. The blood flow from the umbilical cord into his little body looked great, and he measured about 4 lbs 15 oz. so... 5 lbs pretty much. She said that was right on track for where I am at, a little small in the 28th percentile, but nothing to be concerned about- he is just petite. She guestimates that by the time of delivery he will be about 7 lbs if I were to deliver full term. I can live with that!

The next thing on my plate was to get my h1n1 vaccination. I have had the crappiest time trying to get it. Thankfully my awesome hubby made some calls and got me an appt with my OB (whom i had previously talked to, and they wouldnt do anything for me) but Brian apparently is a smooth talker ;) and got me in within minutes. So after a peaceful walk with my dog today I jetted off to the hospital, got my shot and then stopped by Panda Express on the way home :) It was a good day.

I also packed my toiletry bag today for the hospital. Next I need to pack my actual hospital bag! It's all so exciting!!!

In other news, my body is really hitting some limits. My poor back is ALWAYS sore, and nothing seems to eleviate the pain besides laying down- which gets old fast. Ronan is pretty low, so I can feel his every movement of his head on my cervix, OUCH! haha it's all so very worth it though!

So that is all for now. I have moved to appts once a week now! Every friday!!! WOO HOOOO only one month left!!!!!!!!

Maternity photo shoot :)

Our friend Angela drove up to take some pictures of us yesterday. She is starting a photography buisness and could use some more maternity photos to add to her portfolio. She is deffinatly good enough to charge, but she kindly "gifted" them to us :) Since they were only taken yesterday she hasn't had time to put them all on a CD, but she was sweet enough to post a few on facebook, so I thought I would share them with you :)

Here is a link to her website if you want to check it out, I think she deserves a good plug!

http://www.tekoarosephoto.com/

My mother in law is going to hire her for Christmas photos and for Ronan's newborn photos too! She is very talented.

Other than that, things are going good on the home front. Almost 34 weeks! I have an appt on monday, where I think we will be discussing pain management during labor and delivery.
This saturday we are celebrating my husband's birthday and we will also be going to the pumpkin patch and the haunted house like we do every year :) So that will be fun!
I hope everyone is having a lovely week!

33 weeks!

7 more weeks to go... Lord willing less :) Every day I get more and more anxious to meet the little guy hoggin' up all my belly room!!!
Things are going well, I still have a sore throat off and on, so I've been mostly staying at home.
I got my diaper bag in the mail, and I've already got it all stocked up :) It's so cute I love it!!!
I also have my car seat installed now! I feel like everything is pretty much ready!!!
Tummy is getting tighter and tighter and is sticking out further!! I find myself miscalculating it's size on a regular basis. I often open doors on it, or drop food on it. It's really weird, and funny at the same time. Atleast Brian thinks it's hilarious.
I cannot believe it's almost Novevember!! I am hoping to go into labor at the end of November, I just cant believe the time is coming!!!!!!!!!!!

Lord please keep Ronan safe, keep us both healthy. I pray that Ronan will make a safe entrance into the world in your time God. All I care about is his safety. I ask these things in your name. AMEN!

32 weeks!!!!

Well, it's been awhile! I have been reeaaaalllly busy! So, I had my baby shower, and it was soooo wonderful! I'm finally working on getting pictures up, but I'm still waiting for my mom to send them to me since she is the one who took all the pics :) hint hint mom.
Brian and I were VERY blessed by all the wonderful gifts for Ronan. I think we are 110% set for his arrival and MORE! He is going to be a very blessed boy.

So basically since the shower I have been busy washing and puting away all his new clothes, sheets and blankies. The house looks great, if I do say so myself :)

I had my 32 week appt a couple days ago and that went well. Ronan is head down. When my Dr. squeezed his little body to check his position Ronan started what is called an "acceleration" Basically it's like when we work out, our heart rate goes up. Well I guess Ronan was working out! He didn't like that squeezing so he went a little bonkers, kicking up a storm! The Dr. said it was a sign of a very healthy boy, as long as it also goes back down and doesn't just stay up. So we waiting for his little body to calm down, and sure enough is went back down to the 150's. Crazy kid.

I also had to get my flu shot. That left me sleepy and weak feeling. My Dr. also wants me to get the H1N1 vax when I go back in 2 weeks for my 34 week appt. I'm slightly more nervous about that one because it's newer, but it's better than risking our health.
I am choosing to trust my Dr. on that one.

OH, and we officially graduated from our childbirthing classes! It was a blast, I can't wait to finally go into labor!!!!!

Anyway, that is my update for now~ my next project is to eat lunch, then vacuum my car to put in the car seat :) YAY!

30 weeks down, 10 more to go!

30 weeks!!!! Horray! I feel like I am getting bigger every day now! like HUGE. I cannot imagine him having much room to grow anymore! I've been getting quite a few braxton hicks lately, it gets me really excited about going into labor, i cannot WAIT!!!!!!!!!!
My shower is a week from now!! This coming Saturday. I cannot wait to celebrate Ronan's life.
On monday we have our 3rd (out of 4) child birthing class. This will be the one where we have to watch the "video" hehe, Brian is NOT looking forward to it. I personally cannot wait to see his reaction.
Not much else is going on right now. Brian took some time off work because he threw out his back. I'm not complaining all that much because It's great taking care of him and having him home. Sad that he is hurting, but happy he's here :)
We got a swing a little bit ago, and finally got the batteries for it today. It's so fun playing with it and imagining my little babe taking naps in there, or looking at all the little gadgets with wonder.
I SO look forward to seeing his precious little face. The face God created for him. It's a miracle to know that he is kniting him together right now as we speak! Well, he is pretty much already knitted, he's just getting fatter now :)
I long to look into those precious little eyes, knowing that this child is MINE and I am meant to take care of him, he is my miracle, my gift from God...

I am SO EXCITED!!!!!!

29 weeks pregnant

I know I know, I'm two weeks behind and not even a picture to show for it as of now!!! I'm terrible. It's been a very busy couple of weeks. We finally got another car for Brian, YAY, we had to bomb our house because of fleas after that (thanks Hazel) However, Hazel never seemed to really even be carrying the fleas, they only seemed interested in me :( yuck. Brian set off the bombs and the three of us, well, four of us if you count Ronan hanging out in my tum tum, head over to Forest Park. I don't know if any of you have been there, but it's amazing! There was like no one else there! We hiked for awhile, but I started getting some uncomfortable braxton hicks, so I figured my body was telling me to slow down. We made it back to our car, but we still had 2 hours to kill because the bomb took 4 hours! So we put the seats down in our small suv pulled out blankets and pillows and watched a movie on our portable dvd player while we ate the lunches i packed. haha sounds dorky, but it was actually a lot of fun. I ended up falling asleep the majority of the time, then we finally headed back to air out the house. Once that was finished it was already time to rush out to our childbirthing class! it was SO FUN!!! Somewhat silly and embarressing, but still fun. It was neat being in a classroom with Brian. He was such a goof :) We practiced breathing techniques, and different positions for comfort during labor. I look forward to this monday as well!
I also started a new Bible study which I am enjoying, and volleyball is still treckin' along. My days are pretty busy these days, and yet i'm still doing a really good job keeping up on all my home responsabilities too! I'm so proud of myself!!!
Only about 13 more days until my baby shower! I am so excited!!! And 11 more weeks until my little miracle arrives. Please Lord, deliver him safely :)
Not much has changed with my body, it is a little bigger. People on the streets that I don't know can deffinatly tell i'm pregnant now which is exciting!! Still no stretch marks, hmmm i wonder if they are waiting to pop up at the very end hehe, we'll see. I really don't care either way. I'm just blessed beyond blessed to have this strong little boy kicking at me everyday. I love him so much already it's ridiculous. I did NOTHING to deserve this little boy. God is just that good. Thank you Lord.
Pictures coming soon, i promise...

27 weeks

Today is September 4th, which means exactly 3 more months until our due date!!! YAY for the third trimester!!!! SO CLOSE, but it still seems so far away.

A lot has happened, or is happening. Brian's car broke down :( so now we begin the search for another vehicle. Preferably an incredibly inexpensive one that will last us atleast a year with no problems. After then we hope to get a somewhat decent vehicle for Brian to drive. We are also currently working on a loan reconstruction for our mortgage, praying that our monthly payments will drop so that Brian can switch to one job. Brian is also hoping to transfer to the Costco closest to our hope. Right now his commute is about 45 minutes give or take, each way.
My brother in law Brandon is moving out. He has been renting a room from us for about 6 months now. We will miss seeing him, but it will also be nice to have some times together before Ronan comes :) We miss the privacy we had, so that will be cool. I will also have another project to work on. The guest bedroom!! I will be painting that hideous room and making it all pretty for guests (mostly parents when they come to help out after Ronan is born)
Other than that, things are going very awesome. I feel blessed to say that pregnancy wise, everything is still looking good. Ronan is deffinatly establishing a routine. He is so active at times my belly looks like a bouncy house! haha, I love every minute of it though. God trully has blessed our socks off. Every time I feel this little blessing move inside me, I am about brought to tears. I know I don't deserve this miracle. I know he is a gift, and promise from my loving Savior.

Only 3 months to go until I hold you in my arms Ronan!!! I cannot wait to care for you, and snuggle you! You are going to be surrounded by family and friends who are just going to love you to pieces.
Please stay safe little one. I know God has great plans for you!

26 weeks!!!!

Here is the 26 week pic. Just a warning, it's not glamorous. haha I just got back from volleyball :)
And now it's time for dinner! Tomarow is a community care day for my church. We are going to the highschool I coach at to do some yard work there! I will be doing the snack table since Im unable to do much else. But Brian will be out there doing the man stuff. Then it's off to the Oregon State Fair we go!!! I can't believe 6 years ago, I first saw the "grey shirted boy" whom would soon be my husband. And now the father of our son Ronan :) I am blessed. Praise God for his goodness.

only 99 days to go!

I can't believe it's less then 100 days now! The time is slowly approaching!!!!! I had a lot of fun on the family camping trip, SO much fun that I forgot to take a 25 week pic out in the wilderness :) However, I will have a 26 week pic coming your way tomarow I'm sure.
I was suprised by my Aunt and the rest of my family on the camping trip with a baby shower :) She did such a good job! The games were hilarious and the presents were so percious! Both Brian and I felt very very blessed. As soon as I got home I set them all up in Ronan's room hehehe
Other highlights from the trip included, rafting around with my mom and mother in law, rafting with Brian :), playing croquet (and winning), the demented scary stories told around the fire hahah, seeing shooting stars at night, the ride up with Brian and Hazel, watching our new movies, scooping up nasty roadkill with my Aunt and gagging the whole time, watching Hazel dive into the water then roll around in the dirt (nasty) and singing worship songs to our heavenly father around the campfire.
The not so fun parts were having to pee 2 times a night, with the outhouse really far away. (ended up just going in the bushes next to the tent haha) trying to get out off the airmattress, for some reason that was hard to do with a belly. OH and listening to the creepy camping neighbors next to us snore ALLLL NIGHT!
I can't believe next year I will have an 8 month old to cart around with me!!! Lord, what a blessing! Praise you God!!!!!
In more sad news, one of the sweet girls from my due date club, who was due the same day as I lost her son :( My heart just breaks for her and her family. Only God knows why these things happen in our lives, but while I only lost Adriel at 8 weeks, I still know the ache of loss and it's a kind of ache no one can heal but our Lord. Please pray for her and her family.
I'm trying my best to not let the loss effect me, or stress me out too much. I know that God is in control, and I trust him with Ronan. His plans for Ronan are seperate from my own, and I know he loves him. However it does awaken me to the reality and the importence of kick counts. I'm sure I will probably be doing them twice a day atleast.
I pray that everyone is having a safe and happy week! God bless you all.

<>< Melissa

All is well!

Happy to report that all is well with baby Ronan! We listened to the heartbeat today, it sounded nice and strong :) Dr. said that my uterus is measuring right on track.
I will be gone for my 25 week pic, so maybe I will get some one to take one for me at the camping trip :)

24 weeks!

Busy day, not much time to write, but here are some pictures!!! Everything is going awesome, sciatica is a little better when I take it easy and see my chiro and massage person. Nursery is SO much fun!!!!
I have a Dr's appt this tuesday, so hopefully that is all fine and boring, then it's off to camping we go! Praise the Lord! Such wonderful things ahead!

23 weeks!

Sciatica still has the best of me! GRRRR. I'm slowly learning to cope with it a little better. I have seen a chiropractor, and a massage therapist, and both helped a LOT, I can actually walk now, but I still cannot bend over, or twist without pain, or the chance of a flare up again. I will be seeing the massage therapist again on wednesday. Thursday I have an appointment with a family Dr. to discuss my sciatica, and also see how I like the office for Ronan eventually.
My mom is so awesome. She came up today and did a butt load of laundry for me, and my dishes. I can't even thank her enough for her help!!!!!
I am so excited for our up coming camping trip aswell!!!! WOO HOO so many wonderful things to look forward to!
I can honestly say that even though my back hurts like no other pain I've experienced, I am still the happiest woman on EARTH to be carrying this child!! I love him so much! I still get so excited each time I feel his movements. I just cannot WAIT to have him here in my arms. I want to see that face!!!! AAHHHHH i just cant wait.
I finally got around to taking another belly pic, and I thought it would be funny to do another sucking in one aswell. hehe you can deffinatly see my belly bump!! I still get a lot of comments from people saying "wow, I really thought you would be showing more" eerrrr.... welll I'm SOOOOORRYYYY!! Hopfully I pop even MORE soon and people will undeniably know I'm pregnant :)

22 weeks

Wow, I'm sorta a slacker this week. I still haven't taken a belly picture and it took me this long to write my blog!
Tomarow we will finish painting Ronan's room :) It's going to look so wonderful. I will deffinatly post some pics once it's complete.
I'm even more excited to start filling it with baby stuff!!! Only about 60 days until my baby shower WOO HOO!!!
And about 18 days until Brian and I go camping with family!!! I'm so excited, not only to see all of my family at ONCE for like 4 days in a row. But to finally have time to relax with Brian, just having a blast!! 5 days of no work for him!! It makes me so happy. This will be one of our last outings together before Ronan comes. I mean, realistically Ronan is there too, but I'd say he is pretty easy to care for right now, and doesn't require all that much attention.
That also means about 18 more days until I enter the glorious 3rd trimester!!!! The home stretch! It still seems so far away, but I'm praying that things continue to move quickley. I cannot wait to go into labor. Does that sound weird?? I seriously am SOOOO looking forward to Labor and Delivery!!! I just know that it's going to be one of those wonderful memories and moments you never forget. and I cannot wait to experience it, and give God all the glory.

21 weeks!!

I got some paint samples for Ronan's room and when I first put them on the wall, I hated the blue I choose. It looked like white!! But then, after it dried it was just perfect!!! So i think tomarow I will go get the rest of the painting supplies that I need so I can get to work!!
My in-laws gave us their old queen sized bed for our guest room, which will actually be a guest room when Brandon moves out in Septmember. That way, when parents come to visit/help after Ronan is born, they won't have to sleep on an air mattress hehe.
I also finished my registries!! Walmart, Target and Babies R Us. Yes, my baby shower is still 70 days away (who's counting?) but I was too excited to wait, and was dying to put one together :) Brian and I had a lot of fun!!!
My sciatic is acting up again, which leaves me somewhat helpless at home. I really do enjoy being at home, but with the sciatic pain I get a little restless. I'm really trying to focus my attention on the things i CAN do around the house, rather than get irritated at the dishes and laundry that pile up, because it kills my back to bend over and try to do it.. blech.
Other than that, things are going very well. I absolutly love feeling this little guy wiggle around every day! I'm SO BLESSED! Thank you LORD!!!

20 weeks!

WAHOOOOOO 20 weeks!!! I honestly never thought I'd be here. I'm just beyond excited :) Not only am I insanely happy to be progressing in my pregnancy so flawlessly, I am feeling Ronan regularly every day and listening to his heartbeat via a stethescope every night. I call it my "nightly listen" hehe. Brian puts on the sthethy ;) and finds the heartbeat for me, and I listen with a goofy smile on my face until Ronan starts kicking and moving away from stethy. I honestly couldn't be happier, or more thankful. Praise God for these wonderful gifts we don't deserve!! Only 20 more weeks to go, Less than 140 more days!!!!

My 20 week pic will come tomarow. My sciatic is killing me tonight and i am just gonna kick it on the couch.

In sadder news, our beloved family dog Bob died today :( He was old and very loved. It was just his time i supposed. Poor old Bobby. Sweetest doggy in the world.

I have also decided not to watch anymore of those 911 shows on the discovery channel. Today there was one about a pregnant lady who was on bedrest. Her house was broken into, and while she was on the phone with a 911 operator, the scum who broke into her house came at her and took advantage of her. Finally the police showed up to bust him... but still... had I beed in that room, I would have sent that man to God's judgment!!!! I was so upset by the tv show I was crying frantically. I don't know why it impacted me so much, but my heart just ached so badly for her, and I was so furiously mad I was screaming at my tv through my tears... blech. No more of that for me.

On that happy note, I am out for the night :) I will update tomarow with my 20 week pic.

Brian felt his first kick :)

Last night Ronan was giving me some good kicks in his favorite spot... my lower right side, close to my hip bone. I put Brian's hand right over the spot, Ronan got a little shy and stopped. Eventually patience paid off and Brian felt my belly buldge, then another! His face was priceless, it lit right up :)
Lately his favorite times to kick are in the afternoon, when I'm on the computer, and in the late evening. I can feel him getting stronger and stronger! It's the most wonderful feeling in the world. I waited so long for this, it's hard to believe it's really happening.
Thank you Lord. You are SO good to me. Thankyou for keeping Ronan strong and healthy!! I love you with all my heart!!!

19 weeks

I'm still in awe. How great is our GOD??? uggg... I feel so overwhelmingly blessed. Now I just am excited for all the STUFF!!! BABY STUFF!!!! Most of my time and energy will now be on the nursery. I have waited SO LONG to make my nursery and I cannot wait to make it just right :)

I'M HAVING A BOY!!!!! Oh, Little Ronan, you have NO idea how much mommy loves you :)

It's a BOY!!!!!!!

Looks like we will be welcoming a healthy baby BOY into our lives December 4th. Little Ronan Edward :)

Thank you LORD for an amazing appointment, smart doctors, and wonderful supportive family!!!

tomarow is 19 weeks! Stay tuned for a new belly pic!

18 weeks pregnant!

18 weeks today! That means only 6 days until we find out the gender!!! YIPEEE!!! I have been feeling a lot of weird nudges latley. They almost feel like little muscles spasms, but in my uterus. Everytime I feel those little flutters I can't help but smile, then I stop whatever I am doing and concentrate really hard to see if I can feel another.
We are heading down to Salem tonight to spend 4th of July with mom and dad. That will be really fun :)
Poor little Hazel is healing pretty well since her surgery :( I cannot seem to slow her down!!! The first two days she was pretty calm and out of it still, but now she is running and jumping all over. Her stitches still look really good, so I guess it's not hurting her. She still takes lots of rests here and there, so hopefully she will be all better soon.
The gender poll seems to be showing a very close TIE between a girl and boy!! only a couple days left to vote, it should be interesting to see who is right :)

17 weeks!!!

3 more weeks until this pregnancy is half over!!!!! I cannot wait to hold this baby in my arms! Here is my 17 week pic, and a pic of me sucking in, because it looks ridiculous heheh

I still look fat, not pregnant :( and I still have only gained a total of 3.5 lbs. Is that normal?

1 week 6 days until we know the gender! I cannot believe it! Everything will change once we find out! We will have a name for the baby, a theme for the nursery... I just cannot contain my excitement!!! AHHHHHHH

Not much else to report, I have a sore throat right now, so I'm just laying low the last two days, hoping to kick in the crotch so I don't have to go in and be treated (yes, sore throat's have crotches) Other than that, things are going great :)

Blog mini make-over

This was the ONLY way I could get my blog out of one ugly column!!! LOL. FINALLY!!!!!

Well, it looks like everyone is pretty convinced I'm having a boy so far lol! I guess we will find out soon enough, 14 days until we find out the gender!! YAY!!!

I want to go to Babies R US afterwards and look around at all the gender themes for the nursery, although I'm pretty sure I've narrowed it down to my favorite theme for each gender at their online site.

Then I want to set up my registry!! I'm so excited, i cannot believe all of this is really happening, God is so faithful and awesome. I deserve NONE OF THIS!!!! I am worthy of NOTHING he has given me, yet he still is choosing to bless... what a mighty God I serve... All the heart ache and the pain, the tears, and sleepless nights will be worth it when I look into my child's eyes and see what all the waiting was for...

Thank you God...

GENDER POLL

So I'm setting up a gender poll for people to guess what the gender is!!! It will close the night before my ultrasound! so Happy voting!!

Also, my blog has been tweaking out lately so if you have trouble finding where there poll is located it may be at the very very bottom.

All of my "gidgets" that were once so wonderfully located to the left of my blogs have all shifted UNDER my blogs into one ugly column. I am still trying to figure out how to fix this :(

16 weeks pregnant

Today was a good day! Praise the Lord!!! We heard the heartbeat the minute the doppler touched my belly :) YAY!!! Heart rate was between 145 and 150 beats per minute. Now i deffinatly believe that what I have been feeling have been little baby movements in my tum tum :)

Our gender ultrasound is scheduled for July 9th!!!! So about 2 1/2 weeks until we find out what we got in there!!!!!!!!!!! wooo hooo

After the appt we went to Motherhood Maternity and I got some cute maternity items! They are so comfy!! I just can't believe I am buying maternity clothes... God is so good. I remember feeling like this would never happen. I am so thankful every day for his goodness and his blessings :)

Thanks again to all of you who continue to hold me in your prayers :)

<><>

15 weeks pregnant! WOO HOO

One more week until my next appt!!! I cannot wait to hear that beautiful heart, beating away.

Please Lord, continue to protect my little one! Give me peace for my appointment, so that I can trully enjoy thing pregnancy. Thank you for this gift, not a day goes by that I am not thankful. I long to hold this little miracle in my arms, and everytime I look into my baby's eyes, I will remember your goodness :) Thank you God....

Everything is good latley! I feel pretty good. In the evenings I have some back aches and just joint aches in general. Bloat is my constant companion :)

Still waiting for kicks and punches... But that's still a few weeks away.

I'm STARTING to get a little energy back, not much, but more than before. I might help out at a local high school around here for volleyball seaon. It might be nice to go through a season being just a volunteer and not having all those other obligations, just working with girls and enjoying the sport I love :)

Well, Hazel just jumped on my lap and is licking my face like crazy.... i THINK she wants attention LOL....

14 weeks pregnant!

14 weeks pregnant......

Today is 14 weeks!!! I feel pretty good, really gassy though!! but I'm not really sure if that is anything new har har har. Tummy is getting pretty hard and sticking out a lot further than I thought it would at this stage! I swear it looks so much bigger in the pictures too.

I'm so hungry allllll the time and i get really sick of cooking and preparing food all the time... but it has to be done....

If it isn't my imagination, i have been feeling teeny tiny movements latley when I lay down. All last night I felt these little bubble feelings in my tummy, i kept waiting for gas to accompany it lol, but it never did. I wish I was confident enough to say "THAT was the baby" but not quite yet. I cannot wait for the undeniable kicks and punches lol.

Next appt is still 2 weeks away, seems so far! Then Hopefully I can get in 2 weeks after that for the BIG u/s. So here's hoping that in 4 weeks we will know what gender the baby is!!! woo hoo! I cannot wait to start painting and deciding on pattern's and themes :)

Thankyou God for you wonderful gift! Praise you Lord, for the amazing things you do! I LOVE YOU!!!!!

13 weeks pregnant!!!!

Good grief I feel like a fatty!!! I have only gained 2 pounds though, so I don't really understand why I'm looking so fat without weighing much more!

Things are going well! I have been having some back aches, sore hips and peeing even more frequently! speaking of peeing... two days ago I sneazed and peed a little... yikes! guess it's time for keagals lol.

Other than that I feel pretty normal! My head aches have eased up, but my energy level hasn't :( I feel very unmotivated around the house which drives me nuts because there is so much to Do!!!!

Tomarow Brian and I are going to a family wedding, after I pick Brandon up from the airport ofcourse, so that should be fun :)

Hopefully everyone is enjoying their weekend :)



GOD IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

12 weeks pregnant

I officially LOVE my OB!!!! He knew how terrified I was for this appt because of my last pregnancy. So we went straight to the doppler, it took tooo long in my book, but we finally heard the heart beat. PRAISE GOD!!!! oh, man, i love the Lord so much.... so yea, the heart was amazing, then my dr said " lets do an ultrasound for fun! A free one on me!" I was so thrilled, ofcourse i said YES!!! we went straight in and BOOM there was my wiggler!!! I couldn't believe how much the baby changed. It is a tiny little person now and could NOT stay still lol. THEN "for fun" he switched to 3d!!!! We saw the baby putting the arms up on his/her face kicking legs and curling in a ball. It was so touching, i was on the verge of balling the whole time!!!!
Anyways, thank the Lord it was the most amazing appt ever!!!! here are some u/s pics